Og

It's unfortunate that people have this view on sex and that the presentation of this view (even if it doesn't stick) is the main reason for many sexual neuroses in our western world today.

There are compatibility issues. I have had many sexual partners and the one I'm with now (my fiance) is an amazing experience. The others have been varied from totally unenjoyable to "blowing my mind" in their awesomeness. It's an important part of the relationship.

In my opinion (and from my perspective), I think that experience and strength with your sexuality is a value to your future husband. I grew up with this "no sex" junk thrown at me too and it really made me feel horrible the first time I got into it. But I got over it and am extremely happy and healthy in my sexual life with my current partner (both of us have experience).

The notion of "no sex experience" being of some value to a potential life mate is something that seems utterly antithetical to me. Get control of your identity and find out for yourself. I certainly am not advocating being promiscuous or finding your personal identity through sex. I just don't see how you can seek something that you want in a relationship without trying it on a few times to see how it fits and what you like.

It's an empowering feeling when things like sex with others are seen as depth and flavor to a person instead of something to be jealous and skeptical about. To me, people that desire this in a mate are insecure at their core.

As for the health consequences, you can get total control on that one. Don't play the frat boy MTV bull crap circle. Don't look for guys in bars etc etc (stuff I'm sure I don't have to tell you). There are lots of good people out there looking to discover themselves just like you would be.

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Vi veri veniversum vivus vici. (By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe)
The self is not a fixed entity but a dynamic process of relationships
You & I, no distinction. - Tat Tvam Asi
Become Who You Are

jaej

Chap, you're a girl?

Whoa. Weird.

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Chapstiquelova

jaej, haha yeh im a girl the nickname "chap" throw you off?
lol
i didnt make it up...lol...or did something else make you think i was a guy?

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Fool for Christ - 1 corinthians 4:10

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.

John 15:18-21
http://www.flashdemo.net/gallery/wake/index.htm

jaej

No, idk what it was, just in my mind I thought you were a guy.

Wow. Now everything you've ever said has been cast into a new light. haha this is so weird lol

No chap didn't throw me off, but I thought a sn as a reference to Chapstick was a little weird. Holy crap weird weird lol

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jaej

I think I might have been putting you in the same demograph as Faith, which is immature little teenage boy who doesn't really have any grasp on reality. Hmm shows what I know.

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Chapstiquelova

lol well i hope it was a "good" new light? and really?
lol so it chnges your thoughts since im a girl?

__________________
Fool for Christ - 1 corinthians 4:10

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.

John 15:18-21
http://www.flashdemo.net/gallery/wake/index.htm

jaej

Idk. It just seems so different. lol

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Chapstiquelova

ok.......lol....i Had a feeling people thought i was a guy, Guess i was right lol...funny.

__________________
Fool for Christ - 1 corinthians 4:10

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.

John 15:18-21
http://www.flashdemo.net/gallery/wake/index.htm

lauraclay

If you were a guy and had "lova" in your name....
Anyway, I think sex changes a relationship, majorly. And you can fall in love with someone, and then fall out. Not every relationship is meant to be, and not every love is true. What if you save yourself for your wedding night, you sleep with your man, and then you hate it. You don't like sleeping with him, it doesn't fit, you guys just aren't good together. Now, no relationship should hinge on sex, but it's important. You two start to fight. He doesn't get you, you don't get him, and neither of you are getting what you want. You're unhappy. You realize maybe you love him, but not as a lover. What then?

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The purpose of a fish trap is to catch fish,
and when the fish are caught, the trap is forgotten.

The purpose of a rabbit snare is to catch rabbits.
When the rabbits are caught, the snare is forgotten.

The purpose of words is to convey ideas.
When the ideas are grasped, the words are forgotten.

Where can I find a man who has forgotten words?
He is the one I would like to talk to.

Chapstiquelova

True love does not fail. True Love will not love for a while and then end. True love is unconditional and never ending. True love Doesnt Have to have sex ...and if someone wants to have sex before your married, and they really love you then why not wait?
And My marriage isnt going to be based on sex, its going to be based on love. and I believe if i wait on God, then my relationship with my "man" will be fine. And if he doesnt want me for that reason than tell me does he really love me? NO.
And if the marriage is based on Love and God it will be fine...

__________________
Fool for Christ - 1 corinthians 4:10

1 Timothy 4:12
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity.

John 15:18-21
http://www.flashdemo.net/gallery/wake/index.htm