poincicco

Good morning all!

I believe I registered at this forum some time ago, but I never actually started participating in it. Now I'd like to join in on the discussions, so I've reregistered (having forgotten my user name and password from the earlier registration ) So, let me briefly introduce myself here.

I started my adult life as an agnostic, converted to Christianity at 18 years of age, trained for and entered the Christian ministry, pastored in the States for 4 years and spent 28 years in Europe as a missionary, evangelizing and starting evangelical churches in Italy. My faith was plagued by doubts right from the start as well as failure to appropriate or actualize the quality of Christian experience taught and promised in the Bible. I fought these doubts and weaknesses as attacks from Satan, God's enemy and mine, but I couldn't deny the logical nature of the doubts...and the illogical nature of the Christian tenets that I was doubting. These doubts, reinforced by the failure of Christianity to deliver for me on the existential level, eventually led to unbelief and skepticism, an inability to go on denying the obvious: Christianity either doesn't work, or it doesn't work FOR ME. It was past time to throw in the towel...not an easy thing to do when your marriage and career are all built on and around Christianity, but I did it almost four years ago. I am now out of the ministry and living back Stateside and not participating in organized religion of any kind. My spiritual pilgrimmage, which started with agnosticism and led me into evangelical Christianity, has now taken me through the phases of "liberal Christian", theist, deist, and now back to agnosticism. I don't have the knowledge or the faith to actually be an atheist. As I like to put it, I don't believe in God, but I'm rooting for him.

So, that's me and my experience in a nutshell. It has been unique for me, but I don't doubt that it's similar to that of many others of you who contribute to this forum. As I read the various threads in the Intro section of the forum I'll probably find some others of you who have walked a similar road.

Oh, and by the way, by way of a testimony, I have found new peace, freedom, love, joy and abundance of life in agnosticism. It's The Way for me!

romansh

Welcome Poiniccco

It will be intersting to hear more about you.
all the best

__________________
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. ........... Douglas Adams

Og

Welcome friend, Sounds like an exciting experience.

Making that choice to give up your life founding religious stance for agnosticism is a hard one and one that takes a certain kind of person to do. I won't say that it's necessarily a good thing as I can think of many cases where making such a move could cost people their entire lives (too high a price in my opinion).

I have done similar work as part of mainstream denominational christianity (presbyterian/methodist), but not global.

I think there are plenty of people that go on living the life of evangelism when they know that what they profess to believe can not be true (i.e. Billy Graham).

I look forward to your contributions to our discussion.

__________________
Vi veri veniversum vivus vici. (By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe)
Satchitananda - True Being, Pure Consciousness, and Bliss
Tat Tvam Asi - Thou art That.
You & I, no distinction.
Mettā & Namaste

Astreja

Welcome to the forums, Poincicco!

poincicco

Making that choice to give up your life founding religious stance for agnosticism is a hard one and one that takes a certain kind of person to do. I won't say that it's necessarily a good thing as I can think of many cases where making such a move could cost people their entire lives (too high a price in my opinion).

Hdey Og! Thanks for the reply. Sorry I'm late responding. It's been a busy week and I just opened the forum for the first time since last weekend. Your quote above beckons me to reply. Yes, it WAS a difficult move, abandoning life as I knew it. Yes, it WAS a high price to pay. But what was in play was, in fact, my life. I was at a point where I had to choose between my own self-respect or creature comforts. That is, being honest with myself (integrity) or staying in the faith and the ministry simply because bailing was too uncomfortable. In the end, the shame and discomfort of encroaching hypocrisy made the choice both obvious and inevitable. It was either leave or die (if not physically then morally, intellectually, psychologically, emotionally, etc.) I've not regreted my choice for one minute, even as I now live with the difficulties it has created. While not the EASY way, it was the RIGHT thing to do.

I just thought I'd explain that. Take care!

Poincicco

debdodd

Og is on his honeymoon so you won't see him around for 2 weeks ...

__________________
"Ubi dubium ibi libertas."

"We are all lone souls. It pays to know humility, lest the delusion of control, of mastery, overwhelms. And indeed, we seem a species prone to that delusion, again and ever again ....."

Jodou1

Welcome to the threads, hope you enjoy your stay.

__________________
“Infidelity does not consist in believing or in disbelieving: it consists in professing to believe what one does not believe.”-Thomas Paine