messenger

I've been putting this off for two years. I haven't known what to do. I am an agnostic by way of atheism by way of Wicca by way of atheism by way of Christianity. It's been a long journey. I'm almost 50 now. I've tried to believe so many things. In the end, I believed nothing at all.

Then a series of strange events brought me back to God. But not the god of Christianity. They don't hold the patent rights on Him as far as I'm aware. Let me just be really upfront here. I spent 15 years as a Wiccan. I rose in the ranks and am technically a 4th degree (our trad had 4 not 3 degrees) and my official title in my coven was, "4th DD, Elder Matriarch". And I have to say, I was a good leader and counselor to my group. I was a debunker, a skeptic and I taught that to my students of which there were over 100 all told by my 'retirement'. I was the witch you called when you had ghosts and I was the one that disappointed you by sitting you down and explaining all the practical reasons why people think they see them. Anyway, I'm not a foolish, doe-eyed, frightened little girl with stars in her eyes about God, ok? In fact prior to what happened to me, I was known to shake my fist at heaven and DARE HIM to show himself to me and do His worst just to prove to my students he was an archetype we could learn about the nature of Man from, not a living deity! God was no more 'alive' to me than the Egyptian gods my Wiccan teachers made me read about and honor in circle. The Universe was just one big chemistry set gone amuck and I and all of you were just animated dirt, destined to be worm food and that's all. I even at one point toyed with the whole idea that Life was DNA's bid for world domination! That's how far and wide my search took me.

*sigh* Anyway, this is the part I know I have to tell someone or pop. It's embarrassing so try to be nice, ok? I was back in college taking some courses trying for the umpteenth time to just finish my degree (I'm sooo close). I had chosen sociology as my major years ago, back when Wicca was my life's work, and one of the requirements for graduation was to choose a class from the divinity school. The one I chose was called, "Divine Intervention" and it was about Angels and Saints. I thought, hell, more archetypes, why not, sounds easy. The reading was pretty dry until the professor turned us loose halfway through the term and let each of us choose our own books. I chose all sorts of wild Catholic books that I thought would actually be funny. Not in the least. The more I read the more incensed I became. I started having really bad migraines whenever I had to read for school. I got pretty sick in the end, like physically, and actually had to stay in bed an entire weekend after writing one particularly awful essay that was required. Eventually it got so bad, I begged the professor to let me compile a new reading list. He said no, we were too close to the end of the term. One day, when I was finally at my wits end, I called my dearest friend in the world, who happens also to be my cousin and fellow ex-Wiccan HPS, to rant and rave about this reading and writing I was being forced to do. She was patient as, once again, I shook my fist at heaven and screamed at God. I was in the middle of my tirade, having just growled, "No-one should kneel in front of ANY god! There is no god!! Why do people humiliate themselves like that???!!!" and as the last word left my mouth, a booming "voice" "said", "BECAUSE IF I TOLD YOU WHAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU WHILE YOU WERE STANDING, YOU WOULD FALL DOWN!!" And as soon as the hurricane force of that "voice" had finished passing through me (I didn't actually physically hear it) and I came back to myself, I was actually hanging onto the edge of the kitchen counter, on my knees. I swear it. I swear on my children's lives that I'm not making this up.

Right after that, the angel showed up. At first, all I was aware of was what looked like a big smiling mouth hanging in empty space off to the upper right of my field of vision. It was there all the time. I called it Big Smile. Over time, it drew closer until finally I could make out that it wasn't a smile at all but a set of wings outstretched. And then the set of wings got closer and closer until a portal, with bright golden light streaming from it, appeared in its place, the silhouette of a man standing there. I've never seen his face. But he started telling me amazing things. Things I know I never knew or thought. Things that just answer so many of my questions, all those damned questions I carried around with me for all those years!! What a friggin' relief! And I can ask him questions and he answers them and his answers are always so spot on or at least really thought provoking. Everyone in my immediate circle of friends and family know about Big Smile now (as well as others who I've never met but who found out about him from someone I know) and I have people calling to ask him stuff all the time now.

Here's the thing though: He's given me a mission. This mission truly sucks. I have to transmit his words about the Catholic church and, just so you know, he's out to topple it once and for all. And he wants me to tell anyone who'll listen about the REAL God, the one that so many agnostics are aching to find! I want you to know, I personally do not claim the 'glory' for this. I've resisted it, actually. I know that there are a few out there who have read Big Smile's words who I've never met and have already started acting on them. There's a movement coming and I'm supposed to help it by letting Big Smile have some equal press time.

Last thing. Recently, Big Smile 'showed' me his real name. I'm still reeling and I'm not ready to say it. But as he just said when I wrote that last sentence, "Remember and speak all of my names and I will make prophets of you all!" And no, it's not God. But God does pray to us, just so you know.

So, I guess I'll be posting some excerpts from Big Smile's work here. I hope it doesn't offend the forum staff. I promise to keep it shorter than this from now on. But frankly, I don't expect anyone to do anything except write telling me to go seek professional help, so do with the excerpts what you will. If some of you want to 'test' Big Smile (and yes, I already realize his initials are very funny and potentially ironic [so I would have chosen a cooler name if I was making this up, right?]), post some questions. He's not God, so he's not omnitient, but he does have an interesting take on God, Love, Living with purpose, Freedom, religion, Christianity, esp. Catholicism and lots more. I've got at least 189 document pages so far and that's just the stuff I've had the chance to write down! There really seems to be no end to the work. You know, this sucks. I really hate looking stupid. But I surrender, and I do so with love.I hope someone gets something out of this so I didn't go embarrass myself for nothing! This I freely choose to do in service to Love and as it is mutually beneficial to do so.

Ok, now that I've just showed the world that I'm nuts (yeah, thanks for that Big Smile) I'm going. Sorry this was so long.

Peace
Big Smile's messenger

messenger

Oh, and I'm still agnostic, not Christian. So don't think I'm here to 'bring you back into the fold'! No! You were all right to run and good for you.

Peace
messenger

romansh

Welcome messenger......

so if you could summarize for me in a few bullet points preferably short, the evidence for god.
all the best

have fun here

__________________
There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened. ........... Douglas Adams

GX

Welcome Messenger!
I must say I am impressed with your writing style.

I will be the first to take you (or shall I say "Big Smile") up on his offer and I have tons of questions!

1) First of all, what exactly is "Big Smile"? Is he an angel in the sense that he was always a spirit being and never incarnated in the physical universe or was he once a physical form who happens to be your personal spirit guide?
2) Did Neale Donald Walsch, author of "conversations with god" really have a conversation with God? If so are his transcriptions accurate? If not please explain.
3) What about the children of Medjugorje? These are the catholic kids who have been allegedly channeling Mary the mother of Jesus since 1981 in Bosnia regarding a bunch of secrets about the future of the world. Please explain what is really going on there.
4) Does Big Smile have any tips on astral projection?
5) Is big smile aquainted with "Abraham"? This is a consortium of spiritual beings who have been channeled by authors Esther and Jerry Hicks who have wrote several books about it.
6) Big Smile apparently wants to take down the catholic church (no surprise there). What does big smile think of the Orthodox Church?
7) Finally and most importantly, can Big Smile explain the philosophy of one our newest forum members named "MobileDigit" who posted here vaguely and briefly last week and has since vanished?

messenger

There is something that one cannot touch, a thing that even the broken hearts of the disillusioned attest to, and it is Love. Real Love. What I speak of is neither obsession nor the attempt to control others, which so many of you mistakenly call 'love'.

God is Love. Your answer is that simple and that nebulous.

In service to Love,
Big Smile

messenger

1) Big Smile refers to himself as 'a vibratory dimensional being', or what you and I call an angel (just one of thousands of concepts that's been hijacked and polluted by Christianity). -- messenger
2) Go back and read Walsch's words and as you do, replace every instance where the word, "God" appears with the word, "Love". If the author's intended meaning remains, then he speaks of God. Trust what you take away from anything that reinforces that God is Love. When you do so, you are free from having to ask any other being for validation and the need for theology withers within you, while simultaneously, your relationship with God is restored. -- Big Smile
3) Again, when any message supports that God is Love, real Love, then it is God one speaks of. But messengers are themselves subject to doubt, or can become fooled by other men, or are mistaken in their approach. Some messengers aren't here to talk to you, but have been asked to reach the people of a certain segment of humanity (ie., Jesus and the Jews), using vernacular that speaks to their listening. This is why you should never give your freedom over to anyone or anything that would demand blind loyalty to the messenger himself. And don't let vernacular offend you so deeply that you deny yourself some messages, although intended for others, which might lighten your heart and bring you back to God. Use discernment and trust God, not men's ideas about Him. If you hate God based on hating Christianity, for example, you've allowed Christianity to define God for you and for far too many of you, that means complete estrangement from Him. You do have the freedom to choose something else. -- Big Smile
(4) No, that sort of thing is a distraction from your purpose as far as Big Smile's concerned. He's not saying it's not possible, just a waste of your time, that's all. And that's just his opinion, not a law set in stone on a mountain somewhere. The witch in me knows a few things about it, but I'm not here for that. -- messenger
(5) see answers 2 and 3
(6) Big Smile is talking to me about Christianity, but mostly Catholicism and specifically about doctrine and the Roman Catholic authority and leadership. There are other messengers talking to the people who have been separated from God by the Orthodox cult. -- messenger
(7) If you post the URL for Mobiledigit's posting, Big Smile will take a gander. -- messenger

In service to Love
Big Smile and his messenger

messenger

The Book of Hairetikos

The word, heresy, is defined as, "an opinion of private men different from that of the catholic and orthodox church", or “an offense against Christianity, consisting in a denial of some of its essential doctrines”; from Old French heresie, from the Latin hæresis, "school of thought, philosophical sect," used by Christian writers for "unorthodox sect or doctrine," from the Greek hairesis "a taking or choosing," from haireisthai "take, seize," middle voice of hairein "to choose," of unknown origin. The Greek word was used in the New Testament in reference to the Sadducees, Pharisees, and even some Christians, as sects of Judaism by the Apostle Paul who is responsible for the modern meaning, “a crime against Christian doctrine”. Heretic is ultimately from Greek hairetikos ,"able to choose.”

HAIRETIKOS, AIONIOS!

GOD PRAYS TO A HERETIC

A SELF-INDICTMENT MADE PREEMPTIVELY
Blasphemer, your masters will call me, for any truth about THE Truth, called The Bible and The Doctrine of Christianity, that is not prescribed or sanctioned by the leaders of Christianity, are condemned by the Christian authority as the works of misguidedness, insanity or Evil. These men, who are Christianity’s scholars, leaders and priests, are men who would either wield power over other men with Sacred Lies, which is The Doctrine, or are blindly obedient servants of the same. Prayers answered by and private communication with God are generally relegated by The Doctrine to being judged, Men of Power against common men, as symptoms of insanity or demonic possession, if those private revelations should argue the veracity or authenticity or righteousness of the Bible or The Doctrine. When “God’s messages” are reported to Christian authority which agree with The Doctrine, Saints and Prophets are added to the pantheon of Christian mythology, further fortifying their erroneous claims about God and the state of Man’s relationship to Him. Thus are the Sacred Lies, The Doctrine, propagated and transmitted from one generation of Man to the next, unchallenged for fear of punishment or rejection by your fellow man, or worse, the false threat of estrangement from God, as when Evolving men serve only Love and not the ideas of men. Fear is ever-present when men choose to serve Lies, and Lies must be told about Love in order for men to fear Love and its falsely reported need for retribution against the Innocent.

Throughout its two thousand year reign over the hearts of men, Christian authority has sanctioned or ordered the investigation, detainment, and interrogation of men who would openly challenge its authority, were not themselves Christian, or were not the “right kind of Christian”, or were deemed to be “of the Devil” and has excommunicated, exiled, imprisoned, tortured, executed and gone to war, all in the name of God. What Christian authority would not kill or banish, it absorbed and you see evidence of this in the assimilation of the Western European pagan holy days of Yule (Christmas) and Ostara (Easter) and the assimilation of the entire Central and South American continent’s native tribes, examples among many.

For twenty centuries Christian authority has insisted, at the point of a sword, that it, and it alone spoke for God on Earth. Christian and non-Christian men alike have suffered at its ruthless hands.

This is Man’s legacy. This is what Love has shown me to report to you.

messenger

ONE OF MILLIONS OF MESSENGERS HEARING THE SAME PRAYER

I am a humble servant of God, of Love. And I am not the only one. God has been speaking to every man since the dawn of Man’s existence. Even now, He continues to speak to all. And when He is invited by those who listen with the fearlessness and free will He gives every being, He speaks to deaf hearts through those who will serve Love, if only that you might hear just one messenger, for your own individual sakes. When The Doctrine and general Christian thought claim that God has not contacted men since the time of Jesus to argue directly the falsehoods of accepted beliefs concerning God’s relationship to Man, they are misguided or unwise or afraid. Some, who already know what I am about to tell you, are wicked liars.

I have not been directed to address any other theology outside of Christianity in the framework of this message, or Prayer from God, for there are other messengers whose Path it is to do that work. And Christianity is not the only theology on Earth to contribute to the break between God and Man, an estrangement that must be healed in order for all men to return to Love. But God has seen that too many Christians have lost their way and too many Christian Scholars and Leaders are lost as well to leave its churches filled with ignorant slaves any longer. God would have you know that He is not the Church and that Christianity does not speak for Him on Earth. Christianity is not the Path to God and if it ever was, it has grown obsolete. Men must know this in order to become free to return to God.

I am no Author or Keeper of any doctrine. I am no Judge of men or the condition of each man’s relationship with God, with Love. What I tell you was transmitted to me, yet, like all free-thinking men, I reserve enough skepticism to accept that it all could be a fantastic exercise of my personal imaginings. Still, will you judge and decide how God communicates with each of you? For when I was first made aware that I was not alone in my thoughts, I balked, I scorned, I shook a fist at the sky and railed against it, having become one who refused to bend a knee to anything that resembled the gods of men. Until finally, when I shouted into the air, “Why should I bend my knee to anything, even God, who has forsaken men if He exists at all?!”, a wave of immense Love and Power washed over me, saying without sound yet with the strength of a hurricane’s wind, “BECAUSE IF I TOLD YOU WHAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU WHILE YOU STOOD, YOU WOULD FALL DOWN!” and as these words careened through my consciousness, my knees gave way beneath me and, sure enough, as the wave passed away and I had ahold of myself once more, I found that I was kneeling, forced there by the overwhelming power of what had moved through me. I will not say that this was a visitation from something outside of my being. I have no way of proving so, to you or myself. Yet, I sense that I know what I have been shown is worthy of sharing, for it is not any more outside of the realm of Reason to view the human imagination as one of God’s many mysterious methods of “speaking” to men. Use your own good sense, yet be not a slave to fear in the reckoning. Decide for yourself with an open and free heart. God wants you to be the Master of your individual spiritual growth and He needs you to be brave so that He can approach you again, each one of you, mending each man’s heart and re-establishing the Covenants He has tried, in vain, to invite men to join in with Him for so long.

I mean no harm and what I do in telling you what I have been shown, I feel compelled to do by Love, for Love, with Love. Any harm that you might feel in hearing this message, or Prayer from God, that you have been pursuing a set of false theological ideas and beliefs, is caused by your own fear and self-imposed ignorance, not any love for deity. For loving an abusive parent is a symptom of shattered well-being, not a testimony to parental success. And loving a system that subjugates and threatens in order to gain and maintain control over its followers, is not love but rather a conditioned denial, instilled by the system into the fearful, of anything outside of the abuse, which is used to cage the spirit, turning men’s heads away from listening to any message, or Prayer from God, that might arrive to help vanquish that very ignorance-induced enslavement. Judge me not, nor yourself or other men before you have looked to the Wickedness of the Authors and Keepers of Christian Doctrine and have justly and fearlessly set aside those things outside of Love which you have been taught about the deity, called “God”, “Jehovah” and “YAHWEH” as prescribed to men in The Doctrine and also within that Dead Anthology, known as the Bible. Unburden your heart of the Sacred Lies called The Doctrine. Shed the guilt that has been bequeathed to you by the Doctrine’s Authors and Keepers that you are somehow stained with the Mark of Damnation, that you were born unclean, are imperfect, an abomination unto God, for it is Man who is your Accuser and no vision of Loving Deity would ever cast the Innocent so cruelly. You were created Free and Free you can be again when you choose Love over Blind Obedience.

messenger

GENDER, NAMES , AND GLUE

It should be noted that throughout this writing, I will be using male-gendered euphemisms, as “men”, “Man”, “Mankind”, in my descriptions as shorthand for “men and women” and mean no disrespect to women in doing so. I, myself, am a woman and include women in everything I am about to say. I also personify Deity as “God”, “He” and so on and tell you here that the Creator has no gender, but for the sake of a shared vernacular, I have chosen to keep to the accepted form of address used by Christianity, as it is Christianity that will be confronted in this work.

What follows is a collage in writing of what has been shown to me by a “being” not of this Earth, along with my own interpretations of what I have been shown and some directly quoted words from what I think of as “God”, and I would like to use the analogy of a collage to illustrate the construction of what I’ve written. The intermediate “being”, Megameida (Gk., 'big smile'; for he first appeared to me as a large smiling mouth suspended in the ether), as I’ve affectionately come to refer to “him” as, is what I think most would call an Angel, not human in nature, yet a “vibratory being” outside of human reality’s time and dimension who is concerned with the affairs of men for the sake of their reunion with God. "His” contribution can be imagined as the scraps of paper one uses to decorate a collage. “He” communicates not as an audible voice but rather in feelings, and so quickly at times that I am not able to keep up. Therefore, what I receive from “him” seem like scraps torn from a larger picture. The parts that have been transmitted by what I think of as “God” are those emphatic statements that come so strongly that I can barely hold them in my puny limited mind. I think of these passages as the foundation paper that a collage is built upon. What part of this writing is “mine” is included as the glue between the scraps of paper of this collage and the foundation paper of the entire piece and I say they are “mine” only because when the communications between me and Megameidan or God, are too fast or intense, I have to rely on my ability to reconstruct what I feel was “said” but was not able to write directly as quotes at the exact moment they were “said”. For this reason, I ask the reader to use his own relationship with God to hear the essence of this message, which is God’s own Prayers, and not visit it with overly harsh disdain for its failings. I cannot tell you what your personal relationship with God is, I can only share what I have been shown is right for all of Mankind, each one in his own way, to reach for and how, in the most general sense.

Let not words be the barrier to God and Love. If words do not serve Love, then they are not words worth remembering. I wish you all a clear and joyous journey, walking in your own Truth, back to That Which Loves You. Here is my Truth as I have been shown it:

THE TRUTH ABOUT 'THE TRUTH'

There is a Truth, calling itself THE Truth, which is, in reality more precisely named, The Doctrine, which should never be confused with The Word of God, God Who is Love and also That Which Loves You. The Doctrine is not God. The Doctrine is not Love. The Doctrine is not holy to God, that is, it is not sanctioned or blessed by God, yet it is sacred to a group of men, Christians, and it is sanctioned and blessed by these men and they alone. All men who follow The Doctrine without question sanction and bless it by doing so. Participating in its rites is a positive vote for its continued use as a cruel manipulative tool of indoctrination within the cult that Christianity has degraded itself and its followers to become.

The Doctrine is filled with lies, misinterpretations and misleading paradoxes that defy a Truth, called Love, called God, which is Man’s true Salvation. You have no need to fear Mutually Possible Alternative Truths. Ideas alone cannot do harm; when Men serve ideas and not Love, harm is done. The Doctrine demands obedience and inspires fear and attraction to that end. The Doctrine is a body of ideas which are to a greater extent, fear-ordained empirically-stated, manipulative falsehoods. The Doctrine plants the seeds of fear that men cannot receive God’s love without performing the rituals commanded there, that God’s love is not your birthright, that God has judged the entirety of Mankind and found it undeserving of His Love. You must reject The Doctrine, for it is only the acted upon ideas of Man, not the Commands of God, nor the Wish of That Which Loves You. Turn away from the Laws of Lies, called The Doctrine, that offer humiliation and punishment for the state every man finds himself in when he experiences his innate Human Nature to love courageously, to live in pursuit of Love, to offer his life in service to the growth of his very own soul, to teach tolerance for other’s personal Paths to God by being tolerant, to walk a concerted Path of Love, taking the journey that allows him to grow from his missteps, his unsteady childlike footfalls which wind and weave across a central line in the Path that ultimately leads to a uniquely personal relationship and communion with God, who is Love and That Which Loves You.

messenger

Ok, that was the dry stuff, the lead-in. I hope it wasn't too boring. Things pick up right about here. Ready?