Cleric_of_Reason

In a world full of human beings who look outside themselves to something greater than the mortal flesh we dwell in, one group of people has affected me the most: Christians. I do not want to deliver this message in hate nor do I want anyone to condemn me for the following words. I am simply expressing my feelings from one human being to another.

"Thank you."

Thank you that ever since I was in my mother's womb, I was read the Bible.
Thank you that when I was born, I was born into a family that thought they were doing the best they could for me by bringing me up in a Christian home.
Thank you that throughout my entire childhood I was given the Bible to memorize and read and study.
Thank you for telling me I was talking to God when I prayed.
Thank you for teaching me how to lead some one else to God.
Thank you for the fear that was instilled in me that if I did anything wrong, it was enough to get into Hell.
Thank you for scaring me into salvation at the age of five.
Thank you for teaching me that the world was created in six days as fact.
Thank you for teaching me that whoever didn't believe in God was ignorant and deserved Hell.
Thank you for forbidding me to ever fall in love with someone who wasn't a Christian.
Thank you convincing me believe that it was the right thing to go to a Bible college to continue the legacy of ministry.
Thank you for telling me to reject my natural feelings and instincts as a teenager.
Thank you that even now sometimes I lose sleep at night thinking that God will strike me down for rejecting my upbringing.
Thank you that even though I know better now, I will always have that fear deep down that God will judge me.
Thank you for everything.

I'm not really sorry if I have offended anyone. This has been my life. A life of fear, discipline and sheltering. I have been wanting to get this off my chest for a loooong time. As I think back on everything that has happened to me under a Christian roof, it angers me. Not to hatred, but more out of hurt. I love mankind, and I love the good that we are capable of. But this has not been good to me.

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I'm tired of living under a desk lamp. I'm ready to find the real light.

AB517

No, this is for you, not us.

I hope you feel better and move down your own path now.
Remember, you are not alone, whichever path you chose.
It is a god of your understanding, no one else’s.

Cleric_of_Reason

[/quote]

No, this is for you, not us.

I hope you feel better and move down your own path now.
Remember, you are not alone, whichever path you chose.
It is a god of your understanding, no one else’s.[/quote]


You're right and I have started to move on my own path. It's just something that has been really bothering me and I feel better now that I've released those feelings. I'm beginning to move toward a different view of God. It's just hard to explain, but a lot of members hold the same view. I really appreciate all of you and your opinions and discussions. This is the first community I've felt that I can truly relate with.

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I'm tired of living under a desk lamp. I'm ready to find the real light.

xexon

Welcome to de-programming 101. I grew up in the bible belt too.

Whatever people did to you in your youth, they did so out of love. Always respect that.

Now that you've grown up physically, its time to move into spiritual adulthood. You probably won't convert anybody, and your friends might even think you strange. That's okay too. They're on their own path.

Wish them well and kiss them goodbye. You're moving forward.


x

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Destroyer of Worlds

xexon

And don't take any anger with you.


x

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Destroyer of Worlds