Oh, I very much want to participate because it's at least mildly interesting, but you're making it difficult. You sent me a string of 5 PM's in 6 minutes, but you've chosen not to receive PM's. So I guess I have no choice but to respond with a P(ublic) M(essage).
Some very simple research informed me that you're a manic depressive, which I envy you for because my bouts with depression have been devoid of anything even remotely manic.
It also informed me that you're less than two months younger than my son and eldest child, who seems about equally conflicted and unhappy, albeit from a religious vs. a quasi-religious perspective. That's OK, though, because you've obviously thought more deeply than an inch or so beneath the surface about the complexities of life while he continues to gloss over everything as being either black or white with shades of gray outside the realm of consideration. I'd adopt you as a third daughter, but I already have two who don't look at the world quite so simplistically.
So, I've got about 24 years on you in terms of grappling with life and trying to make sense of it. And I'll guarantee you, it doesn't get any easier with the passage of time.
I really don't want to be your enemy. I'd much rather be your friend because I sense we're fellow sojourners in search of an elusive commodity blighthly referred to as "truth", but much less blighthly conceived as an essential element in the meaning of life.
__________________
"I am an agnostic; I do not pretend to know what many ignorant men are sure of."
Clarence Darrow |